Omniun-Gatherum (Random Thoughts 5)

There are wishes we dare not mention to anyone, not being sure that we truly want them. And so we utter them to the One who knows best. I have one such wish. No one knows it. I dare not even explicitly mention it in my prayers. I am not certain of what the outcome would be.

God seems to be granting the wish. But in a way I did not see. God really works mysteriously.

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My voice is gone. Let me correct myself. I do have a voice but it sounds more like a croak. Unfortunately, it was not the result of a night-long singing at a karaoke bar, nor was it because of too much sweets or ice cream. Nope, it was because of the cigarette smoke which wafted inside our apartment-house. Our barangay just implemented a no-drinking rule outside your own houses. And thus, our neighbor, together with his friends, decided to drink for two succeeding nights on the little porch that our two houses share. And of course, for many, drinking is accompanied by smoking. Fine by me. Not my lungs, not my life. But not when the dreaded smoke goes into our house. Not when I am, in fact, allergic to cigarette smoke. Not when I had to shell out a thousand pesos for antibiotics and a special kind of lozenges.

I am planning to speak to him. I do pray that he will take it kindly. I don't want to have enemies. I just want to breathe normally. I just want my voice back.

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I am thankful that I have the choice to change. Otherwise, what a sad, sad life it would be! Change opinions. Change perspectives. Change personalities. Change friends (yes, it is possible!). Change life. But always, always, always for the better.

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With all the problems besetting our country today, I can't help but wonder when all this would end. I have come to love my country more and more as I grew older and I truly desire to see it out of the grasp of corruption, mediocrity, self-interest, in a word, sin.

I joke around sometimes that, in fact, we are slowly taking over the world by sending to all four-corners of the earth our OFWs. But I have seen families ravaged because of separation, kids who are lost without the guidance of parents, of lives becoming second-class because of financial needs. You get to wonder, how we reached this situation? When will all these end?

Against all hope, I dare to hope that one day, there will rise a leader who will spearhead change because he/she himself has been changed.