Uneasy night

I don't ask for much. I just want a quiet night.

I could have watched an interesting movie of Cine Europa at Shangri-la. Or enjoyed Stardust. Another possiblity, to have had dinner with friends.

But I had to go home for I have to work tomorrow. Despite it being declared a special holiday for elections. I am the only one to report for work amongst the locals. A foreign company is coming to meet with local distributors. Since I am the one who arranged everything, it is only rational that I should be there.

So I settled on my folding chair. Read the kit I prepared. Just to make sure that I still remember the details of the meetings as well as review the information about the health sector (as if I would be able to remember them all!). And of course, with the wonderdul wi-fi of my neighbor as well as my own DSL connection, I began to check my mails and blogs, and then, hopping on to other blogsites.

The attacks began. There was just one. Hiayahhhhhhhh! I shrieked. My mom chased and killed it. Then, three suddenly appeared! I had to get out of my room while I edged my mother to ran after them with the not-so-mighty spray. She got one, then the next. But then, another two came!!! I finally realized that they might be coming in from the partially opened wooden wall near my bed (the result of the recent strong rains). I had to refill the spray bottle and let my mom do her thing. I sought shelter from the other room. But there also, two were lurking behind the steel double-deck.

The spray sounds were then replaced by the smashing of a broom against the cement wall. A crunchy sound follows, assuring me that another of their species has just died. It seemed that those little monsters were gone. Finally, I could go back to my blog-hopping.

Nohhhhhhhhhhh!!! Another three came!!!! Nohhhh!!! My mom is downstairs, sanitizing her hands from the accidental spurts of the killing spray. Why are they here???? Either the next door neighbors just did their annual spray or the little monsters felt the arrival of the rain (most likely the latter). But why tonight? Of all nights? When I should be resting!

In my anger, I wielded the mighty broom and killed one, and then another. While my body was covered all over with goosebumps.

Still is... for as I write, I am looking around. I can hear the rustling sounds that their hairy legs and ugly wings make against everything they come in contact with. Only us who are bonafide haters of their kind have this particular talent, the ultrasonic hearing capability. I can feel them looking at me, waiting for the right moment. Waiting for me to close the lights, close my eyes and launch the attack.

This is not going to be an easy night.

Smash! Splat!

I just killed another one.

Blogging

It is really overwhelming to see how the world has become smaller with the invention of computers and internet. It has become easier to communicate with people at the other side of the world. Pictures and updates are sent with just a click. Friends you haven’t seen since elementary days are now accessible through friendster. Foreigners you have met in local events become your poke friends in Facebook. Blogger and Wordpress are your links to fellow serious bloggers. Multiply has become a repository of our lives with its collection of pictures, stories, music and links. I find it very useful to keep in touch with friends and families who are hundreds of miles away in Australia, Geneva, America, London, Dubai, etc.

What I find surprising though is how it has become possible to meet new people through this technology. Gypsy’s adventures led me to various places she has been to. Abaniko’s perspective about things I find quite interesting. I will forever be grateful when Gibbs dropped me a line since his take on the performance world is necessary for those who want to know what is happening around town. Since blogs often contain their thoughts, experiences, and activities, I get a glimpse of how they see the world. Some I got to know through friends, I met Swipe through Blissful drifter and Jojie through Gypsy, Grace and Sillyserious through Beng’s site, and so on and so forth.

I even got an award. Thanks Gypsy for giving me this… In fact, I want to award the same to you. (http://gypsyshaven.blogspot.com/) I am also giving them away to some other people.



To Blissfuldrifter, for the clamchowders, sound trippings and anecdotes about your life, I wish to see more of your stories in print. You have a unique perspective. (http://blissfuldrifter.wordpress.com/)

To Beng, your writing rocks! There is beauty in your words and I know that your are using them for His glory.(http://blissfuldrifter.wordpress.com/)

To Mommy G, I find joy in your stories about your experiences with your boys. I know from where they are getting their smart minds. (http://ginasboys.wordpress.com/)

Safest place

A blast in Glorietta, a commercial area in Makati, created such uproar. A whole section of the mall got destroyed. 10 people died and around 120 people were injured. A lot of them were just enjoying the Friday lunch-out that has become the practice of many Makati office workers.

Once again, fear seem to have pervaded greater Manila. I hear parents forbidding their kids from going to malls. Many are being sent home straight from school or work. Loved ones in the provinces make frantic calls to their kids in the city. Call centers are doing rollcalls of their employees. The turn-out in a foreign film festival was not quite what was expected. My brother just told me that he feared riding public transportation and going inside other commercial centers.

I can't blame them. I, too, became slightly paranoid. Those 10 people never knew that it would be the day when their lives would end. It could have been one of the people I know. It could have been me. Our office's lunch break (1:00 - 2:30 p.m) exactly falls within the blast time. I could have been walking through the walkway towards National Bookstore. I could have been doing a quick grocery at Landmark's basement. I could have been buying a gift for a godchild, in Glorietta II.

In this chaos though, I am thankful that the lunch-hour was over when it happened. It could have been worse. Good thing, salary was given a few days before. There could have been more people in the casualty list.

Surely, for many more weeks, we would be all moving with slight hesitation and fear. Many would think twice about going to public places. There is always the thought hanging over our heads, wondering if another blast is waiting to happen.

I heard again this certain quotation a week ago, way before this tragedy happened. It is the reminder that we need not worry for it says, the safest place to be is in the center of God's will.

The question now is, are you in the center of God's will?

I know I am. I have peace that surpasses all understanding.

If you are not, I hope you are doing something to make sure that you are.

Story of Reconciliation

Hollywood formula requires an ending to a story... and mine should have one.

But in fact, it is a story within a story.

I wrote about this situation as a test for me. God was dealing things in me. My character needed honing. My courage I have to improve. My faith needed a boost.

And so, I did tell.

It was ordeal, especially since my words were foreign. I felt fear all over me, wondering how things would turn out to be.

I marvel though how God works. Everything went smoothly. Peaceful. No raising of voices. No flooding of tears. No sign of anger. Frankly, no one would think something happened.

Yet, something is happening. I am seeing a second chance. I am witnessing a soul coming back. I am hoping that I have been a vessel of reconciliation. To a child who got lost and now is being asked to come back.

I am praying. And I have asked this person to keep on praying. There are so many things that needed fixing in his life. This won’t be an easy battle. The enemy would fight for what he thought his to keep. But my God’s words assure me : He, who is in me, is greater that he who is in the world.

I am holding on to His promise. He would never leave, nor forsake His children.

The story is still unfolding.

Pray with me.

Judgment day

For almost two weeks now, I haven't been sleeping so well. My mind was and is rife with jumbling thoughts and emotions. I find myself turning over whichever way various courses of action. I try to distract into forgetfulness things that are disturbing me.

To tell or not to tell, that is the question.

It has often been easy for me to defend what is correct. I can differentiate between what is right and wrong. And I can be passionate about standing up for what is right and just. But it can be hard when you know the guilty person. It becomes complicated when you know the background, when you know where he is coming from. With this knowledge hanging over your mind, you begin to be understanding, forgiving, even ready to forget.

I have to remember that yes, God forgives the sinner yet He completely hates the sin. That forgiveness does not entail exemption from the consequences of wrongdoings. Also, I have to remind myself that I am not the one to decide the judgment. Someone higher up would do this. But I have to do my part.

We are not perfect but we all have been given the choice. To choose the right over the wrong. Sadly, he chose the other side of the coin. I pray for God's mercy for he who did wrong. But I pray more that he has learned a lesson.

I believe that this is also my test. Tomorrow will be the judgment day.

A test and a trust

Rereading a few months back the Purpose Driven Life, a book written by Rick Warren, I got reminded again that we live life according to how we view it. Or in the words of the author, the metaphor that we use for our life becomes our basis in living life.

Doing what is right: it is a choice entrusted to us. It is a test that I want to pass.

May I have the courage to do it.

How

How do you make right a wrong when the wrongdoer is a friend?

How can you keep the trust when the secret entrusted to you was in itself a betrayal against you?

How can you declare the crime when you might be dooming not only the guilty but also his children?

You want to forgive and forget but how can you when in fact you don’t see a penitent heart?

But how can you remain silent when it tortures your soul not to do what is right?

For I know that by blowing the whistle I might save the sinner from future crimes.

Tough love. How do you apply it?