Delusion Angel
- David Jewell
daydream delusion
limousine eyelash
oh baby with your pretty face
drop a tear in my wineglass
look at those big eyes on your face
see what you mean to me
sweetcakes and milkshakes
i'm a delusion angel
i'm a fantasy parade
i want you to know what i think
don't want you to guess anymore
you have no idea where i came from
we have no idea where we're going
lodged in life like two branches in a river
flowing downstream
caught in the current
i'll carry you you carry me
that's how it could be
don't you know me
don't you know me by now.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Fullness
It all seemed a blur. Did all these things happen? What did each person say and do? But I have a bone-tired body to testify that I had a full day. And mighty happy for what has transpired.
It was a full house. There wasn’t any available space for people to roam around. And it reflected how my heart felt. It was full of joy.
From the start, the boys from the Children’s Garden were full of thanks. I loved it so that they were appreciative and respectful. I enjoyed hearing them say thank you and happy birthday every time any one of them passed me by. I know that it was a full turn-around for some of them who grew up in the streets. It showed much of what the workers had instilled in them.
The afternoon was full of surprises. Not all of them were good. The power point presentation was not working. The food was delayed. The music CD jumped to the sound of its own music. The room became too hot. I was not prepared with my thanksgiving message. Bits and pieces of unwanted things that we wish did not happen. Yet, I take them in as part of the experience.
I want to emphasize the good side. The delayed food was much more than enough. The disarranged powerpoint presentation elicited laughter and smiles from the audience. The unfinished dance that brought forth claps of appreciation and calls for a repetition. And those who helped…
Warning: this may become boring but I want to thank in detail those who took part in this.
JC and Love: for doing the hosting… I knew you were up to it…
Beng and Gina: for rendering into music the theme song
Beng again and Anjou: for creating into reality the words and design of the invitation
Nio and Adrian: for braving the distance and teaching the boys how to dance
Bakery: for providing the before and after snacks of the boys
Children’s Garden’s workers: for everything you have done…
Drae: for the gift song
My father: for cooking the turon and serving the guests with much needed liquids
For Josh and Val: for being our music guy and gal, and josh, thanks for being the techie guy :- )
For Reah and Enoch: for making the powerpoint work
Christian and Claude: for patiently taking the pictures. You did great!
Ptr. Chad: for uttering the birthday prayer for me
Ate Grace and ate Malou: for the cake and the flowers.
TIta Linda: for cooking the delicious pancit and preparing the sweet sago’t gulaman
Kuya Inar: for baking and delivering the carrot and banana cakes
James: for willing hands to help (for being ready to get things and buy extra drinks)
Joseph: for ordering and bringing in the barbecue.
Jay: for rushing to bring the projector
Dexter: for preparing the give-aways
Elizabeth: for making pretty the envelopes and photocopying the colored invitations
Paula, Claude and Val: for manning the table of gift envelopes and give-aways
Ate Aster: for taking care of the utensils, coffee and the drinking water, for your heart full of service
Clarizz: for partnering with me in this event
I am trying hard to think. Did I miss anyone? I hope not. I wouldn’t want to miss out on thanking those who helped. I am a stickler for giving full appreciation to those who deserve it.
Let me not forget ALL OF YOU who came and spent that great day with me. Your presence is gift enough. I feel valued that you considered me enough to travel quite far. There were those who wanted to come but circumstances prevented them. I know that the event was in your mind, more so in your prayers. You told me so and I thank you for this.
As I mentioned in our official thank you letter, I know that many appreciated the efforts that we have done to come up with this unique event. I reiterate the fact that this wouldn’t have been possible without your willing hearts to give. The full impact of this realization hit me later in the night. Most of you, if not all, who came are dear friends and loved ones. Your support will always be remembered and appreciated. And I thank you. Totally. Fully.
I know that we filled the hearts of the young boys to the brim. I do pray that there would be other ways that we can make this happen again. For them to have full lives.
It was a full house. There wasn’t any available space for people to roam around. And it reflected how my heart felt. It was full of joy.
From the start, the boys from the Children’s Garden were full of thanks. I loved it so that they were appreciative and respectful. I enjoyed hearing them say thank you and happy birthday every time any one of them passed me by. I know that it was a full turn-around for some of them who grew up in the streets. It showed much of what the workers had instilled in them.
The afternoon was full of surprises. Not all of them were good. The power point presentation was not working. The food was delayed. The music CD jumped to the sound of its own music. The room became too hot. I was not prepared with my thanksgiving message. Bits and pieces of unwanted things that we wish did not happen. Yet, I take them in as part of the experience.
I want to emphasize the good side. The delayed food was much more than enough. The disarranged powerpoint presentation elicited laughter and smiles from the audience. The unfinished dance that brought forth claps of appreciation and calls for a repetition. And those who helped…
Warning: this may become boring but I want to thank in detail those who took part in this.
JC and Love: for doing the hosting… I knew you were up to it…
Beng and Gina: for rendering into music the theme song
Beng again and Anjou: for creating into reality the words and design of the invitation
Nio and Adrian: for braving the distance and teaching the boys how to dance
Bakery: for providing the before and after snacks of the boys
Children’s Garden’s workers: for everything you have done…
Drae: for the gift song
My father: for cooking the turon and serving the guests with much needed liquids
For Josh and Val: for being our music guy and gal, and josh, thanks for being the techie guy :- )
For Reah and Enoch: for making the powerpoint work
Christian and Claude: for patiently taking the pictures. You did great!
Ptr. Chad: for uttering the birthday prayer for me
Ate Grace and ate Malou: for the cake and the flowers.
TIta Linda: for cooking the delicious pancit and preparing the sweet sago’t gulaman
Kuya Inar: for baking and delivering the carrot and banana cakes
James: for willing hands to help (for being ready to get things and buy extra drinks)
Joseph: for ordering and bringing in the barbecue.
Jay: for rushing to bring the projector
Dexter: for preparing the give-aways
Elizabeth: for making pretty the envelopes and photocopying the colored invitations
Paula, Claude and Val: for manning the table of gift envelopes and give-aways
Ate Aster: for taking care of the utensils, coffee and the drinking water, for your heart full of service
Clarizz: for partnering with me in this event
I am trying hard to think. Did I miss anyone? I hope not. I wouldn’t want to miss out on thanking those who helped. I am a stickler for giving full appreciation to those who deserve it.
Let me not forget ALL OF YOU who came and spent that great day with me. Your presence is gift enough. I feel valued that you considered me enough to travel quite far. There were those who wanted to come but circumstances prevented them. I know that the event was in your mind, more so in your prayers. You told me so and I thank you for this.
As I mentioned in our official thank you letter, I know that many appreciated the efforts that we have done to come up with this unique event. I reiterate the fact that this wouldn’t have been possible without your willing hearts to give. The full impact of this realization hit me later in the night. Most of you, if not all, who came are dear friends and loved ones. Your support will always be remembered and appreciated. And I thank you. Totally. Fully.
I know that we filled the hearts of the young boys to the brim. I do pray that there would be other ways that we can make this happen again. For them to have full lives.
Friday, August 17, 2007
Celebrating and redeeming time
We can only say thank you. Thank you for celebrating our birthdays with us. Thank you for partnering with us. Thank you for redeeming time and changing lives.
Many of you appreciated this wonderful idea of reaching out to those who need our help. God deserves the praise. He gave the burden to our hearts. But we couldn’t have done this without you. We all had a part in this wonderful event. Our success is your success for we did this together.
For those who gave their talents and time, we are grateful that you joined us in this endeavour. We appreciate all of you, who, through prayers and financial support, went with us from the start to finish.
When we started this, we had our faith amount. In our minds, it would be hard to reach. But God showed that He could work wonders. With joy, we share the good news… we achieved our faith goal!!! And a few friends are giving some more.
We believe that what we did last Sunday must not be its end. Investing in the future of human beings must be sustained. Twelve boys need to finish elementary and high school. All of them must learn a vocation. For our endeavours to be not in vain, we encourage you to spread the call: to reach out, right here, right now.
Continue what we started. Please send to your friends the video link of Children’s Garden (http://youtube.com/watch?v=uOx-sgrICHA). Tell them to visit the website (www.childrensgarden.multiply.com). And most of all, pray that there would be more hearts like yours.
Jennifer and Clarizz
= = = = = == = = = = =
You can also deposit your cash donations at:
Planters Bank, with account name: Children’s Garden of the Philippines
Savings Account No.: 167036937
Many of you appreciated this wonderful idea of reaching out to those who need our help. God deserves the praise. He gave the burden to our hearts. But we couldn’t have done this without you. We all had a part in this wonderful event. Our success is your success for we did this together.
For those who gave their talents and time, we are grateful that you joined us in this endeavour. We appreciate all of you, who, through prayers and financial support, went with us from the start to finish.
When we started this, we had our faith amount. In our minds, it would be hard to reach. But God showed that He could work wonders. With joy, we share the good news… we achieved our faith goal!!! And a few friends are giving some more.
We believe that what we did last Sunday must not be its end. Investing in the future of human beings must be sustained. Twelve boys need to finish elementary and high school. All of them must learn a vocation. For our endeavours to be not in vain, we encourage you to spread the call: to reach out, right here, right now.
Continue what we started. Please send to your friends the video link of Children’s Garden (http://youtube.com/watch?v=uOx-sgrICHA). Tell them to visit the website (www.childrensgarden.multiply.com). And most of all, pray that there would be more hearts like yours.
Jennifer and Clarizz
= = = = = == = = = = =
You can also deposit your cash donations at:
Planters Bank, with account name: Children’s Garden of the Philippines
Savings Account No.: 167036937
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Halfways
I am half-excited and half-afraid. Excited for my birthday celebration (together with a friend) this coming Sunday. For what it could bring to the NGO that we have chosen to be the beneficiary of the event. For what we can contribute to the future of needy kids. Half afraid that no one would be coming. Half apprehensive that there won’t be enough food. Half –anxious that we might not raise enough.
I don’t remember anymore if I mentioned it here but two friends celebrated this year their entry to a new decade. They encouraged me to do the same. They said that I would be sorry not to celebrate my birthday this year.
To be truthful, I never had a birthday party in my whole life, the real, honest to God birthday party with dress ups, invitations, dances, etc. Don’t get me wrong. I am not bitter about it. It is just the way it is. When I was younger, we didn’t have enough money for parties. And also, it was not in our family culture to celebrate events with a bang. Later on, it became too much of a hassle to organize them. Easier to just eat out with friends, have some food delivered in the office, buy yourself your own gift, etc.
But the suggestions of my friends were convincing. Why not, indeed? It would be nice to experience a party. True, I can be a sentimental fool. I would relish the fun time I had with friends and loved ones. With fondness, I would remember the people who came, especially those I haven’t seen in ages. But then, the practical in me realized that it couldn’t be a normal celebration. Yes, I get to feed some people some good food. I will receive various gifts. I may even be able to take home some left-over food. But I do not see a regular party to be in sync with my life mission to make a difference in someone else’s life. It just isn’t me. There should be something more than fun, food and gifts.
I’m half environmentalist. Half because I am not really doing anything much about my advocacies. I throw trash in the proper cans. I try not to waste water. I recycle paper and plastics (I know! I know! I shouldn’t even be using this!). And so I thought of doing a tree-planting birthday party. To make people aware that we need to plant new trees. To show them how I so love to breathe fresh air all day. But circumstances prevented me in pursuing this. The nearest place I can think of, Lamesa Dam, is quite far already to some people’s standards. Their planting area is 30 minutes away from the recreation area. Yes, I want my birthday celebration to have a purpose but I also want my guests to be comfortable.
And then, I get invited to the relaunching of Children’s garden. Halfway the program, it dawned on me that I have another option. To invest in the skills’ training of young boys. To help them acquire a future for themselves. My torn heart was swayed easily. I thought it more important right now to make a difference in these young lives.
In the office, I shared my plans to a friend who is also celebrating her birthday this month. Our decision? We cut in half the cost by sharing the expenses. We each bring in half the number of guests. For the same purpose. For the same goal. To raise enough funds for the boys to finsh school. The thirteen boys, anyway.
Here I am, half past midnight, still blogging and thinking. Wishing that all would go well come Sunday afternoon.
I just wish that some people wouldn’t give only half of what they promised to do.
But then, we can only hope for the best, despite our half ways. And pray that God would bless this event.
I know He will. God has never been the halfway kind.
I don’t remember anymore if I mentioned it here but two friends celebrated this year their entry to a new decade. They encouraged me to do the same. They said that I would be sorry not to celebrate my birthday this year.
To be truthful, I never had a birthday party in my whole life, the real, honest to God birthday party with dress ups, invitations, dances, etc. Don’t get me wrong. I am not bitter about it. It is just the way it is. When I was younger, we didn’t have enough money for parties. And also, it was not in our family culture to celebrate events with a bang. Later on, it became too much of a hassle to organize them. Easier to just eat out with friends, have some food delivered in the office, buy yourself your own gift, etc.
But the suggestions of my friends were convincing. Why not, indeed? It would be nice to experience a party. True, I can be a sentimental fool. I would relish the fun time I had with friends and loved ones. With fondness, I would remember the people who came, especially those I haven’t seen in ages. But then, the practical in me realized that it couldn’t be a normal celebration. Yes, I get to feed some people some good food. I will receive various gifts. I may even be able to take home some left-over food. But I do not see a regular party to be in sync with my life mission to make a difference in someone else’s life. It just isn’t me. There should be something more than fun, food and gifts.
I’m half environmentalist. Half because I am not really doing anything much about my advocacies. I throw trash in the proper cans. I try not to waste water. I recycle paper and plastics (I know! I know! I shouldn’t even be using this!). And so I thought of doing a tree-planting birthday party. To make people aware that we need to plant new trees. To show them how I so love to breathe fresh air all day. But circumstances prevented me in pursuing this. The nearest place I can think of, Lamesa Dam, is quite far already to some people’s standards. Their planting area is 30 minutes away from the recreation area. Yes, I want my birthday celebration to have a purpose but I also want my guests to be comfortable.
And then, I get invited to the relaunching of Children’s garden. Halfway the program, it dawned on me that I have another option. To invest in the skills’ training of young boys. To help them acquire a future for themselves. My torn heart was swayed easily. I thought it more important right now to make a difference in these young lives.
In the office, I shared my plans to a friend who is also celebrating her birthday this month. Our decision? We cut in half the cost by sharing the expenses. We each bring in half the number of guests. For the same purpose. For the same goal. To raise enough funds for the boys to finsh school. The thirteen boys, anyway.
Here I am, half past midnight, still blogging and thinking. Wishing that all would go well come Sunday afternoon.
I just wish that some people wouldn’t give only half of what they promised to do.
But then, we can only hope for the best, despite our half ways. And pray that God would bless this event.
I know He will. God has never been the halfway kind.
Monday, August 06, 2007
Underwater
This is me. Cannot be recognized because of the various contraptions. I even tried the flippers. It did made us swim faster but boy, were they heavy! I was feeling the cramps later in the afternoon.
Good thing our new found friends decided to buy an underwater camera. Otherwise, we wouldn't have captured the beauty of the sea. It can be challenging though. What with the strong waves and the diverting variety of the corals and the sea. In this picture, she was only able to catch half of my body.
This is a stone! Nope! I think it is another kind of coral. Or is it a dead coral? Hmmm...
I so love watching the fishes of the sea! Thank God that we were able to see a school of fish! I hope we didn't disturb the class! Hehehe. I miss Apo Island!
Friday, August 03, 2007
Thanksgiving with the ABCs
I make it a point to start a new year by writing down things that make me thankful for the one that just passed. I was not able to make one early this year. It flew too fast. So I decided to write them down as I start a new year that is more real. I am turning a year older.
Thanks Gypsy for the pattern! (http://gypsyshaven.blogspot.com/)
A: Answers. To many of my prayers. Spoken or silent. Even those that are so entrenched in my subconscious.
B: Blogging. In words or in pictures. Postings make me remember. To cherish the good memories and to learn from the bad ones.
C: Camera. Thank God someone created this technology, especially the digital ones. Capturing the imagery has become easier. Now, if only I can replace the broken one.
D: Darcy. My beloved McDarcy. He has been accompanying so much in my writing adventures, limited they may be. Kudos to Apple! No virus to worry about and better specs to offer!
E: Eyes that could see better. I took a courageous step this year by having LASIK. The better to see the world.
F: Family. I wouldn’t be alive without the parents who gave birth to me or the brothers who bugged me. :-)
G: Grub. I love to eat even if I don’t look it. Meat. Fruits. Desserts. Pasta. Fish. Anything and everything. Just don’t make me eat anything with coconut milk. :- )
H: Health. Mine is not perfect but I am happy to be able to walk, to see, to hear, to laugh, to work, to just be.
I: Internet. The DSL, most especially. Connecting has become much easier.
J: Jesus. My Saviour. Life would be so hard without His presence. He is loving and merciful. Faithful. Forever forgiving. He is constantly drawing me to Him. Despite me, mine and myself.
K: Kindred souls. There aren’t many of them but they make life better. Our diversity and similarity makes living more interesting.
L: Language. Its nuances. Its complexities. Fascinating part of interaction. Local dialects, foreign tongues even sign languages.
M: Me. I am thankful that I am me. Despite and because of myself.
N: Nos and naps. I have learned to say no. And still learning. Naps. I am beginning to appreciate them. Especially the long ones. Power naps! Yo!
O: Open-minded. Constantly learning how to be one. This is not easy but I am getting there.
P: Promises. Those that are written in the Word of God. I can always hold on to them when things don’t look so good.
Q: Quid. When you have them and you get to buy what you need and want. I only wish there are more of them to go around. :- )
R: Responsibilities. There are days that I hate them. I know though that I need them for direction, for stability, for the strengthening of my character.
S: Surprises. I love getting them. Especially those that make me shout with glee and jump up and down. A recent one is the promise of an unexpected trip.
T: Travels. I love to travel and see the world. Thank God for those that I got for free or subsidized!
U: Ubiety. For being born in my beloved country. Ironic that the more I travel, the more I love my country. Pilipinas kong minamahal. If only there would be less pollution and better roads. Or better yet, less politics and more actions.
V: Variety. There is beauty in variety. It is wonderful to try out new things and rediscover old ones.
W: Thankful for the WORK that He gave me. Makes me think and allows me to learn new things. There’s variety. I get to go out of the office once in a while.
X: Xystus. A garden path lined with trees or pillars during the Roman times. :- ) It is so hard to find a word that starts with an “x!” Maybe I should be thankful for a xylophone? :- )
Y: Youth. Technically, I may no longer be part of this group but hey, in my heart, I am even younger than most young people I know. Hurray for the young at heart!
Z: Zest. For life. Most of the time. I just hope that I won’t run out of supply.
Thanks Gypsy for the pattern! (http://gypsyshaven.blogspot.com/)
A: Answers. To many of my prayers. Spoken or silent. Even those that are so entrenched in my subconscious.
B: Blogging. In words or in pictures. Postings make me remember. To cherish the good memories and to learn from the bad ones.
C: Camera. Thank God someone created this technology, especially the digital ones. Capturing the imagery has become easier. Now, if only I can replace the broken one.
D: Darcy. My beloved McDarcy. He has been accompanying so much in my writing adventures, limited they may be. Kudos to Apple! No virus to worry about and better specs to offer!
E: Eyes that could see better. I took a courageous step this year by having LASIK. The better to see the world.
F: Family. I wouldn’t be alive without the parents who gave birth to me or the brothers who bugged me. :-)
G: Grub. I love to eat even if I don’t look it. Meat. Fruits. Desserts. Pasta. Fish. Anything and everything. Just don’t make me eat anything with coconut milk. :- )
H: Health. Mine is not perfect but I am happy to be able to walk, to see, to hear, to laugh, to work, to just be.
I: Internet. The DSL, most especially. Connecting has become much easier.
J: Jesus. My Saviour. Life would be so hard without His presence. He is loving and merciful. Faithful. Forever forgiving. He is constantly drawing me to Him. Despite me, mine and myself.
K: Kindred souls. There aren’t many of them but they make life better. Our diversity and similarity makes living more interesting.
L: Language. Its nuances. Its complexities. Fascinating part of interaction. Local dialects, foreign tongues even sign languages.
M: Me. I am thankful that I am me. Despite and because of myself.
N: Nos and naps. I have learned to say no. And still learning. Naps. I am beginning to appreciate them. Especially the long ones. Power naps! Yo!
O: Open-minded. Constantly learning how to be one. This is not easy but I am getting there.
P: Promises. Those that are written in the Word of God. I can always hold on to them when things don’t look so good.
Q: Quid. When you have them and you get to buy what you need and want. I only wish there are more of them to go around. :- )
R: Responsibilities. There are days that I hate them. I know though that I need them for direction, for stability, for the strengthening of my character.
S: Surprises. I love getting them. Especially those that make me shout with glee and jump up and down. A recent one is the promise of an unexpected trip.
T: Travels. I love to travel and see the world. Thank God for those that I got for free or subsidized!
U: Ubiety. For being born in my beloved country. Ironic that the more I travel, the more I love my country. Pilipinas kong minamahal. If only there would be less pollution and better roads. Or better yet, less politics and more actions.
V: Variety. There is beauty in variety. It is wonderful to try out new things and rediscover old ones.
W: Thankful for the WORK that He gave me. Makes me think and allows me to learn new things. There’s variety. I get to go out of the office once in a while.
X: Xystus. A garden path lined with trees or pillars during the Roman times. :- ) It is so hard to find a word that starts with an “x!” Maybe I should be thankful for a xylophone? :- )
Y: Youth. Technically, I may no longer be part of this group but hey, in my heart, I am even younger than most young people I know. Hurray for the young at heart!
Z: Zest. For life. Most of the time. I just hope that I won’t run out of supply.
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Thief of Always by Jaci Velasquez
Before the winter chill has gone
The springtime rivers run
Before the setting sun has disappeared
The moon is risin high
And time waits for no man
Seasons come and go
In the midst of an ever-changing world
This on thing I know
Chorus
You've got to live every moment
As though it was your last
Before the thief of always
Steals tomorrow from your grasp
Before the chance to know his love
Has somehow passed you by
Let your heart reach out
Right here, right now
For the Lord to touch your life
Before the trees have shed
Their autumn gold
To leave the barest bark
The frost beneath the our feet
Will sparkle bright
Like crystals under the sky
And time waits for no man
Seasons come and go
In the midst of an ever-changing world
This one thing I know
Repeat Chorus
Don't ever doubt that God
Can lift us high
Allow the flame of Heaven
To be our guide
Repeat Chorus
The springtime rivers run
Before the setting sun has disappeared
The moon is risin high
And time waits for no man
Seasons come and go
In the midst of an ever-changing world
This on thing I know
Chorus
You've got to live every moment
As though it was your last
Before the thief of always
Steals tomorrow from your grasp
Before the chance to know his love
Has somehow passed you by
Let your heart reach out
Right here, right now
For the Lord to touch your life
Before the trees have shed
Their autumn gold
To leave the barest bark
The frost beneath the our feet
Will sparkle bright
Like crystals under the sky
And time waits for no man
Seasons come and go
In the midst of an ever-changing world
This one thing I know
Repeat Chorus
Don't ever doubt that God
Can lift us high
Allow the flame of Heaven
To be our guide
Repeat Chorus
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